12padams - Phase Books And Videos

[12padams]

New Book Started: Phase Acquaintances - An 18-Year-Olds Nonphysical Social Life
-Preview Available on the first page of my blog.

No longer am I a newbie phaser with basic plans of actions.... MY JOURNEY IS ABOUT TO EVOLVE!!!

My new book focuses on researching phase people. Hopefully this research will allow me to test a concept phase entry technique I have created based around getting a phase person to pull me into the phase every-night and keep me their for as long as I wish. If you haven't already read the description from the first page of my blog I have inserted it below:

"People, everywhere... Who are they? What are they doing? Are they real? The phase is often full of a wide range of seemingly normal people who appear to go about their daily life. Wow its amazing how our brains can control all these people who we saw... Where did we see them? Wait a second, who are they? We haven't seen them before! Oh and they talk, words that we didn't expect them to say. How is this possible? My goal in this book is to find out exactly who these people are and just how intelligent they are. I need a companion on my phase journeys and one of these people seems like the perfect option. The first chapter will involve finding someone who I have never met before. I will befriend this new phase person and get them to help me with the ultimate phase entry technique: "Pulling me out of my physical body into the phase every night". Slowly I will get to know them as they introduce me to their family, house and life while teaching me everything I need to know about exploring the phase. Hopefully the fear aspect of the phase will evaporate once my phase friend and I kill the scary creature in my hallway that haunted me throughout my first book. Now for the big question: "Can my phase friend awaken in my physical body rather than myself?" Find out at the end of the book!"

First Page Book Excerpt:

About Author:
I am currently an 18 year old male living near Sydney Australia. I am halfway through a Tafe course for Children’s services Certificate 3 and will most likely begin working in an after and before school care service once my course is complete. Hopefully I will be able to overcome some of my current aliments such as Scoliosis, Kyphosis, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Low Pain Threshold, Repetitive Strain Injury, Tension Myositis Syndrome, Flatfoot and Forward Neck Syndrome throughout the year as my ability to enter the phase improves. Overall the future is not looking too good for me so I use the phase as a way to escape reality into an enhanced and more exciting life.

The Challenge:
I have decided to take on the challenge of meeting people that I have never physically seen before within the phase to verify their level of randomness and individual intelligence. In my last book I had very scattered success with phase entry however during my phase experiences I saw hundreds of people that I had never seen before in real life. When I spoke to familiar people their responses were unexpected and  non-predictable which proves that the actions of phase people are not simply controlled by the conscious mind. By the end of this book I hope to discover exactly how in-depth the personalities and lives of these phase people are and how they could possibly help us to master entrance into the phase.

My Goals:
- Meet people and creatures within the phase that I have never seen before in real life.
- Speak to phase people and obtain details such as their name, age, hobbies and appearance to get to know them better and revisit them in future phase experiences.
- Befriend a phase person and get them to pull me into the phase as I sleep at night. This should become the perfect phase entry method, remove my fear of being in the phase by myself and become a lucidity trigger if I see that person within a dream.
- Allow my best phase friend to show me around their house and introduce me to their family, friends and life. I will attempt to look up the details that the phase person gave me to see if they actually once existed or currently exist in real life.
- Discover if I can bring the consciousness of a phase person into the physical world by allowing them to physically wake up in my body instead of myself.

-------------------------------------------------------------------END OF EXERPT---------------------------------------------------------

Each chapter in this book will be based on a plan of action/goal and once I complete the goal I will start a new chapter. My first chapter is "Find Someone" which involves finding someone I have never met before and writing down their details/ drawing their picture once I awake.


Book Excerpt:

CHAPTER 1: FIND SOMEONE

My goal in this chapter is to finally meet and befriend a person within the phase that I have never seen before in real life.

Plan Of Action:
1. Search my bedroom for a phase person or creature.
2. If nothing is in my bedroom then slide open my bedroom door and check my hallway.
3. If nothing is in my hallway then open my front door, go into the foyer and knock on my neighbours door (I don’t know who my neighbour is as it’s a rented apartment).
4. Ask the person or creature what their name is and how old they are.
5. Once I have memorized their details say “Goodbye, I’ll meet you here next timeâ€

[Luna]

Sounds cool dude!!!
You have come along way. Good for you! I'll keep checking in to see how you are going. Def interested in the results.

[12padams]

Finally, I've made contact with a phase person
-Yep its true!!! I've never met them in real life but I've met them in the phase. Now I must learn about this phase person and work out whether their consciousness comes from an external source or if its an internal multiple personality.

Plan Of Action:
1.  Search my bedroom for a phase person or creature.
2.  If nothing is in my bedroom then slide open my bedroom door and check my hallway.
3.  If nothing is in my hallway then open my front door, go into the foyer and knock on my neighbours door (I don’t know who my neighbour is as it’s a rented apartment).
4.  Ask the person or creature what their name is and how old they are.
5.  Once I have memorized their details say “Goodbye, I’ll meet you here next timeâ€

[12padams]

First Phase Video On YouTube! Remake Of Day 35

Hey everyone, I got some great news! I’ve just finished creating my first video version of a phase experience I had last year. Basically you can visually see what I have experienced rather than reading and trying to form a mental picture of everything. My goal is to make a video version of each of my phase experiences for the following reasons:
- Offer an alternative to reading for those with a low attention span, AHDH or just dislike reading.
- Allow you to see the actual layout of my surrounding’s and my appearance.
- Increase popularity and knowledge of lucid dreaming, the phase, astral projection and out of body experiences.

My phase videos can all be found on the first post of my blog just below my books. Unfortunately phase videos are a low priority as I have quite a busy lifestyle. The actual special effects themselves and filming/acting techniques are not “Hollywood Styleâ€

[12padams]

Another Phase Experience Video Avalible Now! Remake Of Day 19

Hey everyone, I hope you enjoyed my day 35 phase video Due to some good feedback on spiritual forums I have decided to make another. This new phase experience video is a remake of my first ever phase experience that occurred on day 19 (last video was my second on day 35). Here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MTorDuLmGM

For those who want to compare it to the written expereince you can do so in my book "Teenage Phase Adventures" or here: http://obe4u.com/phpBB3/viewtopic.php?p=3958#p3958

Remember to leave a comment here if you like it because good feedback always motivates me to make more

[12padams]

Scary Phase Experience Video Available Now! Remake Of Day 77

Hey guys, Hope you're enjoying these videos... Heres another I made of my day 77 experience which was the first time I "met" the creature in my hallway. Boy did this experience freak me out! Now you can see rather than simply read the fear I experienced. Here it is:

http://youtu.be/OaVxUzpL_YU

Anyway I'm going to lay off video remakes for a while because I'm a little busy with getting my career with universal childcare started. Ill be back in the future but as always I'll continue to study the phase and work on my books daily.

[investigate]

хэх, I is lazy, and I don't make books, video about my expierience))) but for new into phase it's how rule and guide!)))

[12padams]

Recently broke my phase dry spell and I'll update my blog and books with my new experience and new phase entry technqiue in a day or two.

хэх, I is lazy, and I don't make books, video about my expierience))) but for new into phase it's how rule and guide!)))

Ok, not sure I fully understood what you said but here is what I got from your response:
"I am lazy and don't make books or videos from my experiences. For people who are new to the phase and discovering what it is however your books and videos will be very helpful in guiding them on their journey."

Anyway glad you like what I've been doing Still I'm disappointed about how messy the beginning 2 pages of my blog got since I really changed it a lot through time. Still I am happy with my first blog post which acts like a guide to my journey into the phase.

My Phase-only book (Teenage Phase Adventures) is great for people who are interested in conscious phase experiences experiments in which I follow a plan of action. My other two books are not to be read from beginning to end like my phase-only book however and are specifically for those wishing to understand everything in detail including my normal dreams, wake and sleep times, simulated experiences, technqiues and my general nonphysical theory's and experiences.

My phase videos... I'm still uncertain about them. I made 3 videos which remake my first, second and fifth phase experiences but overall I'm not not totally impressed by them. Lack of Hollywood style effects makes me feel that the feelings and emotions as well as realistic and awesome sensations in my experiences are lost. I don't think I'll continue making them unless I can have them done professionally.

Anyway, thanks for those who have supported me on my journey and I hope everyone enjoys my work. In future ill make yet another book which will be a guide and explaination to the accessing, managing and exploring the phase state with references to my own experiences to prove my concepts and theory's.

[12padams]

After a long time I've made it to the phase. Luckily "The Somebody" is still there...

Plan Of Action:
1. Go to my intercom phone and dial “102â€

[investigate]

Recently broke my phase dry spell and I'll update my blog and books with my new experience and new phase entry technqiue in a day or two.

хэх, I is lazy, and I don't make books, video about my expierience))) but for new into phase it's how rule and guide!)))

Ok, not sure I fully understood what you said but here is what I got from your response:
"I am lazy and don't make books or videos from my experiences. For people who are new to the phase and discovering what it is however your books and videos will be very helpful in guiding them on their journey."

Anyway glad you like what I've been doing Still I'm disappointed about how messy the beginning 2 pages of my blog got since I really changed it a lot through time. Still I am happy with my first blog post which acts like a guide to my journey into the phase.

My Phase-only book (Teenage Phase Adventures) is great for people who are interested in conscious phase experiences experiments in which I follow a plan of action. My other two books are not to be read from beginning to end like my phase-only book however and are specifically for those wishing to understand everything in detail including my normal dreams, wake and sleep times, simulated experiences, technqiues and my general nonphysical theory's and experiences.

My phase videos... I'm still uncertain about them. I made 3 videos which remake my first, second and fifth phase experiences but overall I'm not not totally impressed by them. Lack of Hollywood style effects makes me feel that the feelings and emotions as well as realistic and awesome sensations in my experiences are lost. I don't think I'll continue making them unless I can have them done professionally.

Anyway, thanks for those who have supported me on my journey and I hope everyone enjoys my work. In future ill make yet another book which will be a guide and explaination to the accessing, managing and exploring the phase state with references to my own experiences to prove my concepts and theory's.

I am lazy and don't make books or videos from my experiences. For people who are new to the phase and discovering what it is however your books and videos will be very helpful in guiding them on their journey-you understood rightly and thank you))) My our language don't have articles, in my our language can say: I good; ...

[investigate]

Meditation Experience:

Meditation=phase, for me...

[12padams]

Will I ever meet "The Somebody?
Well, I've had another phase experience and since I failed getting in full contact with The Somebody in my last experience I kept my plan of action exactly the same and had another go at completing it. This time the phase was deepened yet the problem of communication was the intercom itself rather than a fading phase state. I won't give up though... I will eventually meet The Somebody face to face!

Plan Of Action:
1. Go to my intercom phone and dial “102â€

[12padams]

Another Scary Phase Experience Video Available Now! Remake Of Day 143

Hey guys, Its been a while since my last phase video... Here's one I made of my day 143 experience which involves me banging on my walls in an attempt to escape the phase due to another encounter with the creature in my hallway. Don't worry about it though, I no longer am haunted by it in my more recent experiences

Here it is: http://youtu.be/wmMiV256fbI

Still, I just made this one because it was a short experience and not too hard to recreate visually. I really don't know if I will actually continue making these videos or not...

What do you think of these videos? If a more professional Hollywood style movie could be made about a person attempting to enter, explore and research the phase would you want to watch it?

[Summerlander]

Hell yeah!  I'd definitely want to watch it.  So far, Waking Life is my favourite but it is not just about the phase, it is about reality in general and how we perceive it.  It is a great film but they are yet to make one solely about an individual exploring the phase. 

For me it would have to be a realistic journey that would include all the elements that we ponder about and discuss here.  It would include a sense of beauty in that fantasy becomes reality (I'd love special effects like in The Lovely Bones); a sense of adventure exploring the unconscious mind and communing with characters representative of our personas; contact with the deceased (where the individual wonders if they are real or simulated); visiting people in the phase and getting hits (where the individual wonders whether telepathy is at play or just coincidence); entering the phase and witnessing events that later come true (where the individual wonders whether precognition is at play or just coincidence); using the phase as a training ground for waking life (where individual develops skills); teaching and telling other people about the phase state (where the individual learns about how different people react to the subject and the impact it has on society in general - perhaps the protagonist could release a book about it in the film); and, finally, the many views on the phenomena are explored in the film...

...for example: the protagonist could be chased by a dangerous cult who believes that the phase state is a thing of the devil - as a producer I'd have this part of the film in black and white and the dreadful atmosphere would be similar to the one conveyed in the film π (Pi); another actor could play Stephen LaBerge and thus a more scientific approach is also explored; the protagonist could also meet the Dalai Lama who introduces the fact that the phase has been known to Tibetan Buddhists since the 8th century and shows the protagonist how it is linked to many forms of meditation; then we could also have a mystic who believes in astral projection and the real separation of the soul from the physical body; another character could be a philosopher who discusses the many ways in which people interpret reality (this one would certainly make the film very interesting).

All these people from different backgrounds and having various beliefs could urge our protagonist to consider various approaches when entering the phase.  After experiencing altered states he or she could provide a narrative at the end where consciousness and self-awareness is contemplated.

It would be a hell of a film!!!

[12padams]

Well... My Phase Elevator Works   Oh... and so does my own phase entry technique I call "Sleep Simulation".
It appears that trying to contact the somebody through the phase intercom just isnt working so after failing that once again I decided to take another chance and try visiting him in person using the elevator... I've found a pretty cool phase lighting anomaly down in an apartment a few floors below me. Sadly... Still no face to face contact with the somebody

Plan Of Action:
1. Go to my intercom phone and dial “102â€

[12padams]

An interesting idea stemming from a Simulated Phase Experience
I never usually post my simulated phase experiences and when I do I clearly label them like I have above but an interesting thought entered my mind after a recent simulated phase experience. Below you will notice that during my experience I fly from where I live in Australia over the ocean to an unknown place that I believed to be America. When I flew into a building to explore the interior however I noticed it was... Well just read the experience to find out

Important Note: As you know this was a simulated phase experience which means I was not really conscious even though I acted like it (simulated lucidity). Therefor my current plan of action which involves investigating unit 102 of my apartment in search for "The Somebody" was not performed. Simulated Phase Experiences are like a plague for me and come when I am not even trying to enter the phase. In fact that night I was extremely sick and was desperately hoping I wouldn't have one but boom... The desire not to have one made me have one

If you want to know more about simulated phase experiences and how they differ from real phase experience then check out this full explanation topic I wrote: http://obe4u.com/phpBB3/viewtopic.php?t=0

Day 321 Simulated Phase Experience:
I was lying in bed trying to get to sleep when I suddenly noticed messages in the sky outside my window. I quickly got out of bed, sat on the floor and started staring out my window.  The stars in the sky had been arranged to form words and they were flashing on and off at a rate of one flash per second.

The messages themselves seemed to be related to an upcoming alien invasion. I  saw messages such as "We are coming", "Do not fear" and "Change is approaching". The aliens also arranged the stars to show some post invasion creatures that would be replacing the current ones we have on earth.

In the sky I saw the words "heaven cat" below a picture of one. The cat itself looked very royal yet at the same time it looked quite dangerous and potentially aggressive. After the heaven cat I saw another creature called a "hell cat". This one was much worse as it was totally black with red eyes. Something about it looked extremely evil and terrifying yet worst of all was how stealthy it appeared to be.

I continued to sit on the floor looking at the messages feeling quite scared about the invasion yet excited that everything Tony had told me was actually going to happen (Tony has told me an alien invasion would happen in real life). I quickly grabbed my camera ready to film the sky while thinking about how amazing it was that I only had two weeks left of normal life.

As I started filming I stared out at the sky messages in amazement thinking about how life will now be so limitless and free. Suddenly, I thought about performing a reality check even though I was more than certain I was really awake. I lifted my fingers up and tightly squeezed my nose while breathing in through it hoping not to feel cold air flow down the back of my throat.

My excitement suddenly faded when the reality check worked. "No, I'm awake" I thought "This can't be a dream". I repeated the reality check a few more times but sadly I got the exact same result. I was definitely in the phase even though I really didn't want to be in it at that time. Due to my lack of desire to be in the phase my subconscious mind took over and mostly controlled the rest of the experience.

Suddenly my bedroom door started opening by itself just like it had in my day 143 phase experience and recent real life haunting. I quickly ran to it and tried forcing it shut but unfortunately the force opening it was too strong and I couldn't keep it shut. I was too scared to remain in the room and I just had to get out of there.

Without thinking I let go of my door and flew out my bedroom window. It was night time like usual outside and I definitely didn't want to be floating around outside right near the aliens who were rearranging the stars. With desire to go somewhere far away I quickly zoomed over the sea into the horizon of unfamiliar territory.

After flying almost as fast as light for about 5 seconds I arrived at another continent with a well-developed cityscape that I had never seen before in real life. Since it was daytime on this far away continent I guessed that I was somewhere in America because it is on the opposite side of the world to my own continent; Australia.

I flew around the tall commercial and residential apartment buildings searching for somewhere to land. I felt safe in the bright daylight and was eager to explore the interior of a house so I could talk to somebody. Far below I spotted a 5-10 floor white apartment and without thinking I dived down out of the sky into a window near the bottom of the building.

Instantly I fell inside, landed on a bed and rolled off it onto the ground due to my unstable and rapid landing. I slowly got up to look around so I could analyse my surroundings. At first everything seemed unfamiliar yet I soon noticed that the window and the walls next to it were identical to those in my own bedroom.

"Wow this has exactly the same design as my own bedroom" I thought as I looked around the "American bedroom". I quickly searched for a camera so I could take of photo to show my mum what the room looked like once I awoke. The fact that I believed I could take a photo from the phase into real life was proof that I was unconscious which further confirms that this was a simulated phase experience.

Suddenly a thought struck me. "What if this is just my bedroom?" I pondered if this could be true but there was a noticeable difference that set this room apart from my usual phase bedroom. Outside the window of this bedroom I could see the American cityscape with cars, buildings and people I had never seen before. I addition to that I seemed to be on the 2nd floor yet I live on the 7th floor in real life.

"Ok then, if this isn't my bedroom whose is it?" I asked myself. I quickly opened a draw full of school books in search of a name. Finally I found a labelled book and yanked it out of the draw so I could properly read it. At the top right hand corner it was labelled as follows:

Name: Philip Adams
Year: 12
Subject: Junior Authority

My eyes stared frozen at the label for a good 15 seconds while I thought about its contents. I was extremely confused by what I was seeing and I tried to think of a logical explanation. "Well, I guess I'm in a parallel version of my life" I thought uncertainly. I wasn't happy at all with what I was seeing and was about to fly away when "my" bedroom door started sliding open.

"Oh, not again" I thought as I quickly ran to the door and tried to keep it shut. I stared at the book label again while holding the door closed and wondered what "Junior Authority" was because in real life no such subject exists as far as I know. As I stared at the book however my bedroom door was pushed open forcefully so I quickly turned around to see who was behind me.

To my surprise I saw a slightly chunkier version of my mum and dad walk by down the hallway into the kitchen. My mum called out telling me it was breakfast time so I walked out to the kitchen to further investigate how different this parallel life of mine was.

The kitchen counter seemed to be quite messy and unhygienic so I made sure I kept my distance. "Ok, pick something for breakfast" said my mum casually. I quickly opened the cupboards and fridge which had a slightly different layout to their real life counterparts and looked inside.

The cupboards were filled with unhealthy chips, chocolate bars, cakes and never ending junk food. There were a few healthy things there but overall 90% of it was unhealthy. I stood there quite shocked and disguised by what I was seeing because in real life 80% of the food in my cupboards is healthy. As I stood there wondering what to eat I awoke to the sound of my crying sister.
[align=center]-------------------------------------------End of Experience-------------------------------------------[/align]

My thoughts: This experience has really made me think about the selectively generated scenery of the phase (even though this was a simulated experience). How come my mind (assuming this is where the phase scenery is coming from) successfully generated outdoor scenery of an "American" cityscape yet it was unable to to randomly create an interior to the building I entered? And since this was not randomly generated why did my mind insert my own bedroom rather than some other persons bedroom that I have seen or countless other rooms I have seen in movies?

If this only happened once I would probably not think much of it but during my day 316 phase experience when I explored apartment 103 it also seemed to be a clone of my own apartment. Why is the interior of my apartment always inserted in places that I have never seen before? And why is it only the interior of unknown buildings that my mind can't randomly generate? I mean I've often been to outdoor places I have never seen before mainly in simulated phase experiences but why doesn't my mind insert my own apartment's exterior into those places? It's very interesting that that phase can randomly generate building exteriors but not building interiors.

What you all think of this? Maybe someone on these forums could experiment in the phase by having plan of action which involves exploring the interior of a building they have never been in before. See if it is familiar or if its truly unique and "Mind Generated"...

Lastly that book I saw my name on in the phase... The subject was Junior Authority but really it doesn't mean anything to me. Why would my mind put those words on the book? I was thinking that it was possible related to the fact that Micheal Raduga chose me as a Global Moderator for this website but then I realized that this experience occurred 14 hours before that event. Maybe it was a premonition lol

Anyway see you all next time and feel free to comment with your own opinions on what I experience. Goodbye for now

[12padams]

An unintentional phase experience induced through accidentally performing my sleep simulation technique
It appears that my sleep simulation technique is more flexible than I originally thought. Amazingly browsing the internet on my ipad for 30 minutes actually counted as deep sleep. I then attempted to fall asleep by remaining completely still in bed while hoping not to enter the phase but little did I realize that I was performing my sleep simulation technique causing me to enter the phase by accident after noticing an anomaly during a false awakening. Since I didn't want to waste the experience I had a go at completing my plan of action.

Plan Of Action:
1. Leave my apartment through my front door to enter the floor 7 foyer.
2. Press the button to make the elevator come up to floor 7 if it isn’t there already.
3. Get into the elevator and press the “1â€

[Summerlander]

Unexpectedly my bedroom door started sliding open again so I quickly hid my iPad under the covers and turned my head towards the door. My mum sauntered in with a huge smile that looked extremely forced. She walked sideways towards my wardrobe as she stared directly at my eyes with a tremendously happy yet very sarcastic and fake looking expression. Her lack of words and awfully suspicious smile made me feel extremely uncomfortable.

I get suspicious in these situations too.  You just get that feeling that something's amiss.  Meanwhile, the Gamma activity still rages on inside your head...

“I have been decreased from any point of mental existenceâ€

[12padams]

Alternatively, she could also symbolise an idea that you have once nurtured but are now beginning to discard or no longer hold it close to your heart.  This could even involve a belief that you are about to jettison.

Oh wow! Exactly what it must be! I have lost interest in the phase now and at that point (my last phase experience) I really had almost given up... or maybe it was the idea that the phase was more than simply the mind... or the idea that tony was putting into my head.

From a Freudian point of view, the mother could symbolise your own growth and perhaps you may feel that there is an impediment (please note that this may not be the case).

I definitely feel that she does hinder me... in the beginning it was mainly that I felt she was stopping me from entering the phase. She always told me not to interrupt my sleep... That's the only way I could ever get into the phase.

it could be an expression of how you may feel that your individuality is stalled by being dependent on her

Very true... She wants me to have a specific life... I don't want it and can't have it due to something in my mind that can't be changed.

Anyway... Goodbye for now everyone, Its been almost a year but I moved past the phase of my obsession with the phase. Maybe one day I'll go through another phase phase but for now I wish you all the best of luck with your own phase phase.

[Summerlander]

Oh wow! Exactly what it must be! I have lost interest in the phase now and at that point (my last phase experience) I really had almost given up... or maybe it was the idea that the phase was more than simply the mind... or the idea that tony was putting into my head.

This may well be.  I think being exposed to another view which also seems feasible can shake our beliefs.  But you know what, even if it is all in the mind, this mind has everything, and, if one thinks about it, it is inherently connected to the universe at large.  In the end, it doesn't matter what it is but what you take from it.

I definitely feel that she does hinder me... in the beginning it was mainly that I felt she was stopping me from entering the phase. She always told me not to interrupt my sleep... That's the only way I could ever get into the phase.

Mothers for you.  They worry so much and tend to think they know what is ideal for us.  Interrupting sleep isn't harmful - especially when you catch up in the phase.  We may be awake in our sleep, but the body is resting.  My mum feared I'd be attacked by demons at one point!

Very true... She wants me to have a specific life... I don't want it and can't have it due to something in my mind that can't be changed.

Anyway... Goodbye for now everyone, Its been almost a year but I moved past the phase of my obsession with the phase. Maybe one day I'll go through another phase phase but for now I wish you all the best of luck with your own phase phase.

I didn't have my debit card until I was 20 and my mum still dictated to me even then.  I love her and still have a good relationship with her today, but I'm glad I broke away.

Anyway, you have certainly been a great character here.  Good luck with whatever life you choose, but don't discard the phase completely.  That's my advice.  Look back at your adventures and you'll realise that the characters you have met in that state have spoken to you (even in their mystical silence).  Even now, they have reflected back to you what is going on.  The feedback can be very valuable and influence your decisions in a positive way.

Here's a proposal, and please consider giving it a shot even if it is the very last phase experience you'll have.  Enter the phase and find yourself a wise man, doesn't matter who or what he looks like, he could even be your double.  Then, discussed your decisions with him, ask him for advice.  He will have a wider perspective than you.  Follow his advice, and, if it proves fruitless, then you may abandon the phase state completely.