Summerlander's Blog

[Summerlander]

Date: 04/01/2013
Planned method: dream consciousness
Bedtime: 2am
Awakening: 8am
Return to sleep: 8.15am
Attempt: successful
Awakening: 10.45am
Phase experience: mental programming

I went to bed a bit late as I didn’t have to get up to go to work in the morning. I slept like a log for six hours, had a brief conscious awakening, and reinforced an intention to achieve dream consciousness as I fell asleep. During the day I had done numerous reality checks and prior to bedtime I reviewed my dream journal as I had Stephen LaBerge’s Mnemonic Induction of Lucid Dreams (MILD) method in mind. As I lay in bed, I began to mentally rehearse a scenario where I explored multiple universes to my heart’s content. In the morning, after my brief awakening, I went back to sleep and began to dream.

I was on an aircraft flying over the world and went so high that the Earth’s spherical form could be discerned. I was about to skydive again (I’ve done a tandem jump at 13,000ft in reality) but this time it would be on my own. I jumped and landed safely in a desert. The plot changed and I was now running and swimming with family and friends on a crowded beach. Then, my dreaming mind began to display typical dream cues that I’ve come across before. I experienced a sudden and inexplicable sense of danger, like something catastrophic was afoot. After this, the sky quickly turned grey and its serenity was subsequently ravaged by turbulent dark clouds. The beach was now gusty and I was urging people to get out of the water and leave but nobody seemed to listen. Instead, they were awed by the peculiar shape of clouds that reached all the way down to the level of the sea with their little stagnant twisters. I wasn’t quite lucid at this stage but something was familiar. Before I could suss out the nature of what was perceived, I was back in the desert walking with an old schoolmate, that I have not seen in years, called Waqas.

It wasn’t until we entered the amenity of a futuristic facility that sold simulated fantasies for the mind a la “Total Recall” that I become consciously aware of my situation. The place itself was so far-fetched but I’m not even sure if that is what made me lucid or if I was already headed that way since the beach scenario. The environment was now looking like the reception hall of a campus on an open day and I was standing in a queue next to Waqas. I started to deepen the phase and noticed several leaflets on a white tablecloth a few feet away. At first glance, the leaflets appeared to be written in Russian, which almost made me dismiss them if Waqas hadn’t whispered in my ear: “They are mental program devices.”

Of course, they were not devices in appearance, they were leaflets, but now there was something compelling about them as though they were the key to something desirable. I picked them up and examined them intently. The foreign words printed on them meant nothing to me but the images they displayed - of surreal places - spoke more than words, and, the more I looked, the further they went beyond the two-dimensional scope of the paper. It was like the laws of physics were being gradually broken as I was being enveloped by a magical nexus of multiple gateways that led to other universes. The initial sensation was synonymous with that of being engulfed by hypnagogic imagery.

In this new setting, my mind was showing me that it could go beyond what I had previously imagined as an ideal Nexus room containing mirror-portals in my phase workshop. The phase appeared to be outdoing my imagination, or at least building upon it. There were a myriad gateways all displaying the worlds where they led. There was no floor or ceiling where I was. There was no need for such things and they were not desired at that moment as I free-fell amidst glorious ruptures in perceived space-time continuum. Ahead of me, Waqas euphoniously expressed his admiration for what was happening. “Come on, man…”, he said. “Catch me if you can!” And with that, he vanished in that multicoloured hyperspace.

The child in me wanted to give chase. This was my newfound hide and seek. I could go through any wormhole, scan other regions of existence in search of my long-lost friend and get back to the hyper-spatial nexus any time I wanted. A particular rupture in the mantle of hyperspace thrust me in orbit around an earth-like planet. Beneath the curvature of its horizon, where atmosphere and dark space met, the nightscape of a highly advanced alien civilisation was partially covered by lathery clouds. Another gateway led me to a universe where space was green and foggy, like a never-ending nebula that engulfed a plethora of galaxies. Another one landed me hovering above an Egyptian-like city with statues of dragons, golden sand and a bright red sky. I flew upwards to discover that the awesome nexus was already the space beyond the atmosphere of that Egypt-like land.

I spun in order to maintain the phase state and found myself falling with Waqas through a tunnel of energy. We landed in an entrenched, post-apocalyptic war zone. Immediately, we were hiding from each other and exchanging gunfire like a pair of kids. The artillery in that setting seemed to have been left behind by soldiers. I found a motorcycle and started revving its engine before riding it. Waqas climbed aboard behind me but I didn’t want him to so the vehicle began to decrease in size until there was only room for one of us. He fell off and I continued riding around in my silly moped. I swerved away from objects, performed wheelies (which I’ve never done in waking life), did abrupt U-turns, heard the screeching of tyres and watched how my antics produced lots of billowing dust.

After a while I began to feel like I was riding a toy and when I looked around, the place had changed. It was now an outdoor nursery area and I felt like a child. I remember asking Waqas where we could find the “mental program devices” but it felt like I meant them in the context of playing with toys. I’m pretty sure I was losing the phase then and falling into an ordinary dream state. The following events were still vivid but I mistook them for reality. I was now a little boy, my mother turned up, looking taller than what she actually is, and she told me and my friend that dinner was ready. The environment had turned into something like my childhood home before I woke up around 10.45am.

[NOVA]

I enjoy reading your trips Summer.
I get to have them too, but my husband keeps waking me up. He doesn't understand how important it is to me for him not to.
I think when we move into our own house (soon)with a bigger bed (kingsize) I might have a better opportunity to finish and record my experiences.

[Summerlander]

Yeah. Michael is on the money when he says that it is better to practice the phase away from our sleeping partners.

On this issue, here is a recent phase where my wife caused me to foul...

Date: 12/01/2013
Method of entry: dream consciousness (unplanned)
Bedtime: 2.15 am
Awakening: around 9 am
Return to bed: 10 mins later
Attempt: successful (at the given opportunity)
Phase experience: vague hybrid memory

Me and my wife ended up going to bed at 2.15am after having a few alcoholic beverages with our neighbour Helen. I remember waking up a couple of times during the night to use the toilet. I was not planning to enter the phase in any way. In the morning, around nine o’clock, I used the toilet and returned to bed ten minutes later. As I was feeling groggy from the alcohol and the late night antics, I fell asleep as soon as I hit the pillow. The dreaming began vividly as far as I’m aware...

I was hiding in a town full of warring vampires and this scenario was perfectly logical to me. The monsters were viciously one another as well as killing any human that got in their way. I decided to hide inside a house but it turned out to be a vampire lair. I had no choice but to pretend I was one of them as I believed at the time that this was the only option I had for surviving the ordeal. I was lucky enough to find a fake set of vampire teeth and discovered that they possessed the magical property of turning me into a real vampire when I put them on. Suddenly, I felt super strong, my muscles began to bulge, my canines became genuine and a natural excitation surged within me.

The house suddenly looked like my adolescence home and the family of vampires accepted me as one of their own. Before I knew it, I was socialising among my family and friends. We all nestled down on the sofa and turned the TV on to watch a film about vampires starring Wesley Snipes (no, it wasn’t “Blade”). Someone asked me to call the most mean spirited of vampires who happened to be in the attic by himself. When I went to get him, this one sulked and mocked the rest of us for wanting to watch a film. He seemed to think that watching TV was the most ignoble thing a vampire could do. This dream character was a complete stranger to me and certainly the only vampire at this stage of my non-lucid dream.

I went back to the living room and sat on the sofa with the others. The sofa rocked back and forth and I told everybody I could fall asleep very quickly with the motion. I shut my eyes and pretended to snore and heard laughter in the room. I was comfortable and felt that sleeping rather than watching TV was an attractive possibility. Suddenly, I acquired the perception of a phantom body apart from the dream body that I thought was real and the process of entering the phase came to mind. I was about to have an OOBE within a dream but at this stage I believed the dream was reality. An intentional forward motion triggered spinning on a head-to-toe axis. I was somersaulting in a dark void before I made the decision to glide ahead and out of a partially perceived body resting on a rocking sofa.

Vision was weak but I could still make out people sitting on a sofa that was now stationary. I treated the environment as a product of the phase state and began to deepen it immediately in order to get rid of the fuzziness. The others appeared to be watching TV and were oblivious to my presence. I realised that the events before reaching the phase had been part of a dream. I was wary of approaching the TV spectators as I wanted to avoid submission to another dream plot. I was well aware of the fact that I had just attained dream consciousness rather than having entered the dream world fully conscious as is the case in perceived separations from the physical body from the waking standpoint. The initial stage of this phase experience was marked by shock at the realisation that none of the people I socialised with in that setting had been real.

As I walked out of the living room, the phase started to fade so I palpated objects, walls and peered at details in order to bring its depth back. There was a subsequent improvement in the quality of the environment but full depth was only attained when I rubbed my hands together whilst puffing on them. I couldn’t help but notice the amazingly intricate cutaneous prints on my hands. I was standing in the hallway of that house and two bicycles were propped against a wall and partially blocking my way. I studied their minute details with my fingers and learned that wire was sticking out of the complex framework.

Then, I remembered that I had devised a plan of action in waking life for the next time I entered the phase but I couldn’t recall what it was. During the day at work, before I knew that I’d be drinking alcohol with Helen, I told myself that the next time I entered the phase I would do a card trial (deck of cards experiment) and then translocate to the gallery in my imaginary workshop. Now, having unexpectedly found an opportunity for phase entrance and taken it, all I knew was that one of the steps in my plan involved the workshop. I decided to translocate there immediately in the hope that the relevant environment would jog my memory.

I ran back to the living room in order to shut my eyes and open them to the workshop environment but this attempt at translocation failed. As I blindly dashed into the room I could hear the people from my previous dream talking to one another. A voice chuckled and said: “Look, he’s back!” I found this a little distracting, and, as I knew I was approaching a wall I feared I would crash into it. I stopped abruptly and instinctively covered my face in order to protect it. My mistake was regarding the wall as though it existed. I shouldn’t be surprised then that when I opened my eyes the living room still surrounded me. I turned around and ran in a reattempt at the same translocation technique.

I emerged in a blue room with a toy-strewn floor. None of the playthings looked familiar or even remotely like my children’s. I looked at these strange and colourful objects as an opportunity to maintain the phase via the intensification of tactility coupled with the goal of learning from the haptic data. I felt that the room existed in the mirror world inside a simulation of my abode. A toy clock started ringing on a pile of objects. I picked it up and turned it off by flipping a switch. Subsequently, as I tried to remember my plan of action, I paced up and down the room. I knew I needed to find something and out of the blue I decided that there was a safe hidden behind a particular wall area. A blow to the spot with my fist revealed a square-shaped hole. When I peered inside I made out a metallic safe next to a device resembling a boiler meter. I opened the safe and pulled out a paper strip with the number “3436” on it. This number doesn’t mean anything to me in particular.

In the real world, Stacey moved in bed, knocked me and I fouled around 10.30am. Having involuntarily exited the phase, I realised I hadn’t really carried out any of the steps of my action plan which I now fully remembered. It appeared to me that I had experienced a vague hybrid memory constituting the ideas behind two steps. The urge to translocate to the workshop first - which landed me in the blue room - might have stemmed from a dim awareness of the step concerning a visit to the gallery. The element of looking inside a safe to find a numbered paper strip could have its roots in an inner desire to execute a card trial. Moreover, the latter step was supposed to come before the former. It appears that the manifested outcome was contorted either by subconscious elements, stray thinking, the combination of two different concepts (one demanding art, and the other, numbers - originating from two different brain hemispheres), or, the agency of ethanol in my organism (alcohol can indeed affect one’s memory).

It is worth taking into consideration the fact that memory and other mental faculties can fail us in the phase as well as the waking state. Sometimes the latter can assimilate the kind of reasoning most common in dreams. I will provide an example that illustrates such scenario. Recently in waking life me and my wife were watching a cooking program on TV. When she put a comedy show DVD on we could hear the sounds from both because we have a surround sound system. It wasn’t until she pressed the AV button a couple of times that it settled solely on the DVD sound and picture. Anyway, while the sounds from both TV and DVD aired, I was convinced that my kids had turned their telly on and the volume was up when it was past their bedtime. Just as I was about to go upstairs to tell them off it dawned on me that it would really have been out of character of them to do that. While awake, I had made an assumption about reality that didn’t really fit the norm and remained ignorant about the surround sound illusion until I had my moment of lucidity.

[Summerlander]

Date: 03/03/2013
Method of entry: dream consciousness (unplanned)
Bedtime: 2am (undesired and had tea)
Awakening: 5 am (unintentional)
Return to bed: 5.10 am (after loo)
Attempt: N/A (involuntary lucid dream + woke up at 10 am)
Phase experience: Sea Dance

I pre-lucidly boarded a ship whilst being pursued by a gang. I looked out of one of the hatches to behold bad weather looming over a machinery-ridden deck. The sky became gradually darker and more thunderous as I felt that my pursuers would soon find me. Suddenly, it dawned on me that being pursued and extremely bad weather were common dream cues for me. Everything became clear as my lucidity meter skyrocketed.

I plunged into the sea and my body undulated to the rhythm of its waves, and, like a dolphin, occasionally rising out of and falling back into the water. I appreciated not feeling wet and was enjoying myself so much that I wanted to share the experience with someone. Voila! Out of the blue appeared my wife surrounded by a serene environment. The sea was calm and the sky was blue and clear. I saw how the water reflected sunlight realistically and decided to excite my other senses by splashing and listening to the sound it produced.

I took to flying and soared through the sky, going all the way to the exosphere, only to plunge into the sea again at maximum speed. Stacey was doing her own acrobatics and looked happy. I was very excited about where I perceived myself to be. We started walking on water towards each other and watched how the sea gradually turned into a solid and bumpy crystal bed graced by patches of snow. I commented to Stacey on how magical such transmutation seemed. I rubbed her shoulders in order to maintain a good depth of the phase and requested that the two of us turn away from the beautiful landscape in order to will another epic transmutation.

As if by thaumaturgy, when we turned and I wished not to look at the entire landscape, it was as if we suddenly stood on the edge of the world and a blue foggy wall had emerged before us about a yard away. That was all I could see as I tauntingly wagered against pseudo-Stacey that the landscape would transubstantiate back into water and not scorching desert sand as she predicted. I thought I would win in the self-complacency that only I could have absolute lordship over that lucid dream world and not some illusory character resembling my wife. I was wrong. When we turned around, I saw multiple sunlit sand dunes and the shimmering horizon was indicative of arid climate.

I took off like Superman towards the horizon and discovered something peculiar. I had literally reached the confines of that world in the form of a quirky, atmospheric barrier that can be best described like a vitreous corner of dense air as the meeting point for two intersecting, sky-blue walls and the vacuum below me. The environment was literally and masterly closed off in three dimensions. I parted this oddity with my hands as though the sky walls were curtains, and, in doing so, expanded the dreamscape.

The Stacey character appeared to have followed me in flight into the next world, a world where we continued our acrobatic dance in the vast expanse of an enclosed basketball court. “I feel like I’m in The Matrix!” - I exclaimed. Suddenly, a horde of figures like agents from the film I was just thinking about emerged from the ground. I fought a few of them off in midair as part of my fun while Stacey dealt with the ones that never left the ground. “Another lesson in martial arts!” - I thought. I was effortlessly blocking all manner of attacks with great agility.

I wanted these characters, who had started out as “agents” but now appeared to be ordinary men, to be more challenging. My desire seemed to cause them to grow taller and beefier. I was besieged and dwarfed by them. But this excited me because it was exactly what I wanted. I fought them with confidence and they smiled at me as though we had a special partnership as a means to a beneficial end. I woke up at 10am feeling great.

Dream consciousness was not planned prior to bedtime at 2am after a cup of green tea. Prior to the involuntary induction of the phase state, sleep had been interrupted at 5am by a need to use the loo.

[Summerlander]

Date: 21/04/2013
Method of entry: Indirect
Bedtime: Around one in the morning
Awakening: 4 am
Return to bed: Remained in bed until phase entrance
Attempt: Successful
Phase experience: Chinese Boy

I woke up around 4 am and decided I was going to attempt to separate from my body. As I relaxed, a hypnagogic voice told me to buy my wife a car (my wife doesn't even have a licence). I thought that if I'm just gonna have a voice giving me silly advice when I'm trying to enter the phase then I might as well fall asleep.

But then, it occurred to me to gently get up in a separation attempt. I did it but I was blind and immediately fouled. Now I was feeling like I'd been given a dose of nitrous oxide, and, after a few seconds I separated again.

Again, blind, but I could feel the bed frame with my hands. I began to rub them and succeeded in manifesting vision. I began to deepen by performing sensory amplification feats. The hallway environment outside my bedroom was well lit but the colouring was dull. Something peculiar: even the walls and the ceiling were carpeted and the texture was like that of a bathroom matt.

I could hear myself breathing heavily and getting ready to enter the rippling mirror before me - my magical entrance to my workshop. I hesitated for a second. Do I enter the mirror now in order to see a manifested idea for a painting in the gallery of my workshop or do I check a deck of cards in my room to do an experiment?

I chose to head for the mirror...

On the other side of the mirror I found a slightly dark room and an Oriental boy stood before me. He looked about 8. By now, my memory had suffered. What was my plan? The boy approached me, held both of my hands and said: "Arlindo, where do you wish to go? We can go anywhere at all," and I replied, "Chinese boy, I can't remember my plan." At this point we are holding hands and slowly spinning. The boy continues: "You must be quick because my energy is low and I'm getting tired." I replied, "Chinese boy, wait, I'm trying to remember..."

Then, I could see the boy's frustration. "Arlindo, you're making me angry, we haven't got much time," and in a eureka moment, I replied, "I got it, Chinese boy, the painting..." - but it was too late and I fouled.

While I lay in bed I felt that I could pick up where I left off but decided to get up and write the experience down. The "Chinese boy" puzzled me. I told my wife and she reminded me that we had watched Dirty Sanchez with our mates before bedtime. In the episode, the nutters were kissing lady boys. Funny how my wife interpreted where the boy in my phase experience came from.

He was a "boy", Oriental looking like the lady boys in Thailand, and his hair was like a lady's. Our minds can be funny sometimes. LOL.

[denis1798]

how much of your account experiments phase?

[Summerlander]

Hi, can you rephrase the question? I'm not sure I understand it. Here's another phase experience:

Date: 23/03/2013
Method of entry: Indirect
Bedtime: 1 am
Awakening: 5 am (used the loo)
Return to bed: Shortly afterwards
Attempt: Successful
Phase experience: Psychokinetic Butcher

I had finished work at a warehouse, completely oblivious to the absurdity of this situation as in real life I work in a bookmaker shop. A Scandinavian woman that I took to be a work colleague of mine accompanied me on my way home. I remember thinking that my wife could suspect I was having an affair if she saw me with this woman, who spoke English with an accent and occasionally used Portuguese words. “You speak Portuguese, too?” - I asked. “You got me!” - she replied in a bubbly tone. I woke up and realised that she had been me all along (no wonder she used Portuguese words). On the way to the loo I promised myself that I would question the nature of my reality next time a stranger spoke to me in Portuguese.

Back in bed I decided to try entering the phase using the technique of separating from the body. Relaxing on my back, a lapse of consciousness seemed to have occurred before I came to, fully lucid, in a strange house. The place was a shambles, like a family had just moved in. A ladder led to a dark loft that aroused my curiosity. I gravitated towards the square opening on the ceiling in order to explore it. I rubbed my hands together and thought of how cool it be if my bedroom was in that loft. Suddenly, the dark and empty loft had turned into a bedroom with curtain-covered windows seeping crepuscular light. The cuspidal ceiling above me adumbrated the roof, and, astonishingly, a massive bed supported me and practically covered the entire floor. I felt excited about the manifestation of an ideal bed, large enough to roll around on it many times over.

As I bounced on the mattress I remembered something from waking life: recently, a few houses in my area have been broken into. It occurred to me that the phase state might be used for andragogical purposes such as rehearsing appropriate action in the event of a burglary. So there I was, in that lucid dream room, expecting the house to be burgled at any moment as I approached a balcony. For a bedroom in the loft the ground outside was incongruously high and I caught two adolescent boys jumping up and attempting to grab hold of the balcony bars. Then, they were suddenly men and I was so keen to face them that I ended up instinctively using telekinesis to levitate them into the bedroom, and, in its dark ambience, I mutilated their bodies with a blunt knife. One was killed instantly and the other was disabled with severe injuries.

Then, while I pinned the injured one on the ground, I gouged out the dead man’s left eye and kept pulling on a red thread of flesh until his cerebrovascular innards came through the skeletal socket. The severely injured accomplice screamed in horror so I took the pleasure to stuff his mouth with his dead friend’s guts. I was exhilarated with power even though gutting the burglars in such a surreal way wasn’t exactly what I had in mind in rehearsing how to deal with a break-in. After all, telekinesis cannot be used in real life to overpower interlopers. Although their entrails were quite lifelike, they were not structurally realistic. I suppose my mind could have concocted something close enough to the real thing from years of being exposed to a great deal of human anatomy pictures and even if I hadn’t been exposed to that kind of material in my life I suspect my mind would have created something convincing from imagination. My hands were covered in blood and I wondered if I had experienced the same elation as some psychotic killers do or something similar.

When I looked up and out through the balcony railing, I discovered an old man sitting in a restaurant across the road, staring disapprovingly at me from behind a pane of glass. He raised a hand and telekinetically caused a lamppost to break away from the concrete pavement just outside the restaurant. Then, a swift gesture on his part set the object in motion towards me. I gesticulated in an attempt to mitigate the old man’s control over the airborne lamppost and the object ended up crashing in the middle of the road. This had not been foreseen. Something impossible had happened in the phase which required me to use unconventional means to deal with it. Using telekinesis, I forced the old man to smash through the window and all it took was a gesture to make him ascend through the air and splat on the pavement below.

In the real world it goes without saying that I would not be able to deal with a witness to my crime in such a way. Indeed, my actions in the phase had already defeated the purpose of learning to realistically handle a mundane situation such as a break-in. What sparked my behaviour might have been the temptation that comes with finding oneself in a scenario of absolute power. Indeed, I felt drunk with power and the old wizard had proved to be no ordinary witness. The course of events in the phase gave me a profound sense of elation that egged me on to unleash my powers in a destructive way. I was the apex of that dream world, the master endowed with consummate power, and I wanted to express that. I began to gesture with my hands and supernatural winds swept people off the streets. Even a bus got caught up in my magical gust and it went flying to crash afar. And there I stood, on that balcony, summoning and playing with the wind, like a homicidal god, until I woke up at dawn.

[denis1798]

How many times have you been in a phase?

[Kate]

How many times have you been in a phase?

The proper question would be how many times this week?

[denis1798]

Yes, you could!

[denis1798]

I'm sorry, I'm from Russia, I find it difficult to write

[Summerlander]

Hmmmm... I've been doing it with a lot of success for five years now. Excluding multiple and involuntary phase entrances in my childhood, I would say an average of 6-7 experiences per month with a few re-entries on some of the nightly sessions. So, over roughly 5 years...do the math...maybe something like 400 phase experiences.

[Kate]

Hmmmm... I've been doing it with a lot of success for five years now. Excluding multiple and involuntary phase entrances in my childhood, I would say an average of 6-7 experiences per month with a few re-entries on some of the nightly sessions. So, over roughly 5 years...do the math...maybe something like 400 phase experiences.

This is very-very good.

[denis1798]

Tell your most amazing experience?

[Summerlander]

So many amazing ones. It's hard to pick a favourite but I will have a look at my journal and post one that makes an impression on me!

[Summerlander]

Date: 04/01/2013
Planned method: dream consciousness
Bedtime: 2am
Awakening: 8am
Return to sleep: 8.15am
Attempt: successful
Awakening: 10.45am
Phase experience: mental programming

I went to bed a bit late as I didn’t have to get up to go to work in the morning. I slept like a log for six hours, had a brief conscious awakening, and reinforced an intention to achieve dream consciousness as I fell asleep. During the day I had done numerous reality checks and prior to bedtime I reviewed my dream journal as I had Stephen LaBerge’s Mnemonic Induction of Lucid Dreams (MILD) method in mind. As I lay in bed, I began to mentally rehearse a scenario where I explored multiple universes to my heart’s content. In the morning, after my brief awakening, I went back to sleep and began to dream.

I was on an aircraft flying over the world and went so high that the Earth’s spherical form could be discerned. I was about to skydive again (I’ve done a tandem jump at 13,000ft in reality) but this time it would be on my own. I jumped and landed safely in a desert. The plot changed and I was now running and swimming with family and friends on a crowded beach. Then, my dreaming mind began to display typical dream cues that I’ve come across before. I experienced a sudden and inexplicable sense of danger, like something catastrophic was afoot. After this, the sky quickly turned grey and its serenity was subsequently ravaged by turbulent dark clouds. The beach was now gusty and I was urging people to get out of the water and leave but nobody seemed to listen. Instead, they were awed by the peculiar shape of clouds that reached all the way down to the level of the sea with their little stagnant twisters. I wasn’t quite lucid at this stage but something was familiar. Before I could suss out the nature of what was perceived, I was back in the desert walking with an old schoolmate, that I have not seen in years, called Waqas.

It wasn’t until we entered the amenity of a futuristic facility that sold simulated fantasies for the mind a la “Total Recall” that I become consciously aware of my situation. The place itself was so far-fetched but I’m not even sure if that is what made me lucid or if I was already headed that way since the beach scenario. The environment was now looking like the reception hall of a campus on an open day and I was standing in a queue next to Waqas. I started to deepen the phase and noticed several leaflets on a white tablecloth a few feet away. At first glance, the leaflets appeared to be written in Russian, which almost made me dismiss them if Waqas hadn’t whispered in my ear: “They are mental program devices.”

Of course, they were not devices in appearance, they were leaflets, but now there was something compelling about them as though they were the key to something desirable. I picked them up and examined them intently. The foreign words printed on them meant nothing to me but the images they displayed - of surreal places - spoke more than words, and, the more I looked, the further they went beyond the two-dimensional scope of the paper. It was like the laws of physics were being gradually broken as I was being enveloped by a magical nexus of multiple gateways that led to other universes. The initial sensation was synonymous with that of being engulfed by hypnagogic imagery.

In this new setting, my mind was showing me that it could go beyond what I had previously imagined as an ideal Nexus room containing mirror-portals in my phase workshop. The phase appeared to be outdoing my imagination, or at least building upon it. There were a myriad gateways all displaying the worlds where they led. There was no floor or ceiling where I was. There was no need for such things and they were not desired at that moment as I free-fell amidst glorious ruptures in perceived space-time continuum. Ahead of me, Waqas euphoniously expressed his admiration for what was happening. “Come on, man…”, he said. “Catch me if you can!” And with that, he vanished in that multicoloured hyperspace.

The child in me wanted to give chase. This was my newfound hide and seek. I could go through any wormhole, scan other regions of existence in search of my long-lost friend and get back to the hyper-spatial nexus any time I wanted. A particular rupture in the mantle of hyperspace thrust me in orbit around an earth-like planet. Beneath the curvature of its horizon, where atmosphere and dark space met, the nightscape of a highly advanced alien civilisation was partially covered by lathery clouds. Another gateway led me to a universe where space was green and foggy, like a never-ending nebula that engulfed a plethora of galaxies. Another one landed me hovering above an Egyptian-like city with statues of dragons, golden sand and a bright red sky. I flew upwards to discover that the awesome nexus was already the space beyond the atmosphere of that Egypt-like land.

I spun in order to maintain the phase state and found myself falling with Waqas through a tunnel of energy. We landed in an entrenched, post-apocalyptic war zone. Immediately, we were hiding from each other and exchanging gunfire like a pair of kids. The artillery in that setting seemed to have been left behind by soldiers. I found a motorcycle and started revving its engine before riding it. Waqas climbed aboard behind me but I didn’t want him to so the vehicle began to decrease in size until there was only room for one of us. He fell off and I continued riding around in my silly moped. I swerved away from objects, performed wheelies (which I’ve never done in waking life), did abrupt U-turns, heard the screeching of tyres and watched how my antics produced lots of billowing dust.

After a while I began to feel like I was riding a toy and when I looked around, the place had changed. It was now an outdoor nursery area and I felt like a child. I remember asking Waqas where we could find the “mental program devices” but it felt like I meant them in the context of playing with toys. I’m pretty sure I was losing the phase then and falling into an ordinary dream state. The following events were still vivid but I mistook them for reality. I was now a little boy, my mother turned up, looking taller than what she actually is, and she told me and my friend that dinner was ready. The environment had turned into something like my childhood home before I woke up around 10.45am.

I think this is probably my favourite one at the moment...

[Summerlander]

Date: 13/10/2013
Method of entry: indirect method
Bedtime: 1.45 am
Awakening: 6.30 am
Return to bed: 6.45 am
Attempt: successful
Phase experience: back garden wonderland

After using the toilet I went back to bed and fell asleep with the intention to enter the phase at the next awakening. The plan was to expect to find, and communicate with, any characters encountered. As soon as I woke up, and became incidentally aware of sleep paralysis, I got up in a bid to successfully separate from my perceived physical stencil. I just moved without wasting time and without worrying about the nature of this action. I did it exactly like Michael Raduga recommends: "robotically." The question of whether I stood in my bedroom in physical form, or as a wraith in the phase, was considered after the effort to enter and engage in the hybrid state.

The environment was darker than expected and I suspectedly took that as an indication that I was indeed in the phase. I frantically rubbed my hands together as I walked out of the room and into the hallway. Then, I huffed and puffed everywhere in a bid to brighten up the mental environment. I had succeeded in literally breathing life into the surroundings and effectively deepened the phase state. The first thing that struck me was a massive blue poster, replete with cartoons, on the wall where the mirror (which sometimes I use as a portal) should have been. This poster was strangely familiar and I believed it existed in the real world as a palm-sized sticker. (To my amazement, I would later discover - in waking life - that the sticker does not exist and would recognise the 'poster' incident as a product of bizarre thinking or false memory in the phase state.)

I entered an altered version of the bedroom where my two sons sleep and headed straight for their closed window. I passed through it like a ghost and beheld a rich expansion of a garden - far more extensive than my back garden in reality - under a sunny blue sky. It was like a multicoloured fairground; full of giant toys; intricately detailed and lifeless human props; tables, chairs and canopies; and the vegetation was incredible. I didn't even know where to look as I scanned the vivid cyclorama. But I was not exactly flying or hovering above this garden (if one can call it that). I was falling, slower than I would in real life, but fast enough to alarm me and make me think that I would break my phantom legs when I hit the ground and feel excruciating pain. My legs buckled under my perceived weight (not such a Casper after all) but no pain was felt.

The grass was thrice taller than it should and many toy-like objects previously observed were now missing. As I scanned the fine soigné shrubbery and burnished fence at the confines of the garden, my audition became gradually and noticeably amplified. Sounds and voices of people behind me having a good time, and, the more curious I got, the louder they got. I turned and saw that the mannequin-like "props" had come to life...

The alfresco socialisation in the lucid dream world was more than what I bargained for. I was excited to get involved. I targeted a smiling, silver-haired old woman wearing black suspended dungarees. "Who are you?" - I said, rubbing my hands to maintain the phase. She had huge, bright blue eyes and not many wrinkles. "Cynthia" - she said, looking directly at me. "Cynthia?" - I enquired to make sure I heard right. She seemed annoyed, like I heard wrong, and corrected me: "No! IN-thia!" I found this unpleasant and I could swear she had said "Cynthia" clearly but now it was "Inthia" or something like that. I regarded her as a nonsensical and faulty animate object and moved on.

I bumped into a tall and colossal man in a black suit. He was dark-skinned and exhibited a massive jaw. It didn't get more masculine than that and he appeared to be some sort of bouncer or security agent. "How you doing, mate?" - he said, looking down at me. "Aw-awright..."
He suddenly seemed to have received bad news through an earpiece and evinced a state of emergency to the socialisers: "Let's go everyone! Start running... NOW!" - Curious, rather than alarmed, I demanded from the bouncer, "What's going on?" This one replied: "It's been two weeks and we've had no results!"

"What!?"

Everyone started running in a panic towards a tunnel, at the end of the garden, which wasn't there before. I was well aware that the phase state could very quickly turn into an ordinary dream so I reminded myself to stay focused and promote consciousness by shouting at the crowd: "Oi! Where are you going? This is my dream!" But they didn't listen as they disappeared into the tunnel along with their colossal bouncer. I chased after them down that well-lit tunnel whilst killing two birds with one stone: demanding that they return to clarify the situation, and, reminding myself that it was all a dream. "Get back here! I am your master! This is my dream! Why are you running?"

"Look behind you!" - A voice from the running crowd said.

I did and could not believe my eyes. A giant man-monster, a sullen aberration thrice bigger than the running bouncer, was furiously gaining ground. But I was not scared. I was annoyed at the human monster for intruding in my phase world, for making the socialising crowd that had aroused my curiosity disappear, and, mostly, I was annoyed at myself for failing to control my mental environment. I turned and tackled the monster's legs. This one fell. BANG! I heard a loud noise and fouled...

The kids were playing in the rooms already. One of them must've dropped a heavy toy and disturbed my sleep. I related my OOBE to my wife while it was still fresh in my memory instead of writing it down in my journal. I was pleased with the experience but I was also puzzled by the "two weeks" and the "no results" uttered by the bouncer. What sort of conflict could be brewing in my mind?

[Summerlander]

Date: 10/11/2013
Method of entry: dream consciousness
Bedtime: 1.30 am
Awakening: unknown
Return to bed: unknown
Attempt: successful (unplanned)
Phase experience: gammon-beef hybrid

This morning, just before heading off to work, I enjoyed a delicious piece of succulent meat. It was also deliciously unusual for me as it compounded the best of both worlds: gammon and beef in one. Imagine that! You’ll have to imagine what I describe because you will not find the gammon-beef hybrid anywhere in the real world - unless, of course, you lucid dream about it, which is exactly how I managed to achieve such a sating experience. I’d woken up to use the loo and went back to bed whilst thinking about yesterday’s revision of Raduga’s The Phase guidebook, particularly about sensory amplification techniques. I wasn’t thinking about the subject in order to evoke the phase state, it was only random excogitation, but this led me there nolens volens. As I relaxed on my side, contemplation of past vivid sensations experienced in the phase state’s dreamland began to take a life of its own without my immediate awareness.

I was hypnotised by my internal monologue which described the experience of touching objects and tasting exotic food in dream worlds. Strangely, as I recall it, vision appears to have emerged before I was fully conscious of it. My soliloquy continued and made me initially oblivious to what surrounded me: tables fraught with food alfresco. I was like a wedding reception on a sunny day. In front of me, succulent meat on a plate. Still oblivious to how I got there and what was happening, I continued to lecture myself: “If I was in a lucid dream, I would be picking up that steak and eating it, all the while paying attention to the sensations…”

I guess the subject recalled the urge to pay attention and be more conscious of one’s percepts which in turn begged questioning the reality of the situation I found myself in: “But, where am I? Who cooked that steak? What am I doing here?” My inability to answer those questions made me more alert and led me to the most plausible conclusion. The penny had dropped: “Ah! I’m dreaming right now!” I devoured the hybrid meat and my taste buds had an orgasm. I woke up and boasted to my wife about my phase experience tout de suite.

If dreaming is an ensuant phenomenon to a dormant brain gradually unfolding itself back to consciousness, the phase state provides the awareness of this very fact as well as the ability to slow the process down in order to achieve its own best-of-both-worlds meridian: a vivid dream environment and full waking consciousness.

[digitalvygr]

14/12/2011:

After arriving home from work at 11pm (previous day), I had a ham and cheese sandwich and a cappuccino.  Before going to bed at 1.50am, I mentally rehearsed my plan of action for the phase.  The first step involves travelling to the octangular point of arrival within my devised metaphysical workshop where I will enter the art gallery that makes up one of its rooms.  My plan is, quite intentionally, to be shown - by Salvador Dali - a manifest idea for a piece of art that I’m yet to produce physically: the “Cat Cityâ€

Doh I have been trying to read through your blog Summerlander, but apparently many of your longer posts have been truncated somehow :-( I see from replies that this particular experience had many returns to the phase, wish I could read more about that...

Anyway, for now it is still an inspiration even if I cannot read all of your journeys in their entirety!

[Summerlander]

Don't worry, I'm currently writing a book called "To Lucidity and Beyond: A Personal Account of the Elusive Phase State of the Mind." I got distracted with other pursuits regarding the phase but I am willing to reattempt a reconstruction of the phase workshop and to meet Salvador Dali who will be instructed to show me a manifest idea for the "Cat City" painting. The painting will be based on a Cat City that I found myself in when I entered the phase via dream consciousness on the morning of my wedding day.

[digitalvygr]

Very cool Summerlander, looking forward both to the book and to your painting!

I am looking forward to using the phase in such constructive ways as well. I had my first back to back OBE experience last night, and managed to take some medicine for the first time (well more like a supplement, namely pine pollen which helps naturally increase testosterone in real life, looking forward to seeing how it translates into real world activity). Will write that one up later today, if you have a chance would very much value your feedback, seems you are about the only one active on this forum and if not for your one comment in my blog I would be pretty much talking to myself lol.

[Summerlander]

Date: 03/01/2014
Method of entry: indirect method
Bedtime: 2.00 am
Awakening: 7.15 am
Return to bed: 7.30
Attempt: successful
Phase experience: on the phone to the subconscious


I went to bed around 2am and woke up at 7.15am. I read about lucid dreaming and reviewed my oneiric programme. As I relaxed, I imagined lucidly entering the dream world and picking up a telephone to communicate with my subconscious mind or inner self. I fell asleep with the intention to reach the phase state, and, once I caught an awakening, I succeeded in separating from the perceived body stencil. Darkness surrounded me and I tried to deepen the phase state by rubbing my hands together, touching walls, palpating objects, and running my fingers along the floor while attempting to peer into it. Still, all I saw was darkness. My orientation was telling me that I’d just stepped out of my bedroom and into the hallway. I felt like my eyes were glued shut and my eyelids blocked a well-lighted environment. I rubbed my eyes to no avail and then remembered that this seldom works in getting rid of duskiness in lucid dreams. I started rubbing my hands together instead and a vivid house interior came into view. I returned to my bedroom expecting to find a phone on one of the bedside cabinets in order to converse with a subconscious voice. No phone was found. Instead, I saw jewellery boxes and tinsel. I fouled. A lucid dream re-entry attempt failed and I ended up falling asleep.

I dreamt about smoking rolled up cigarettes with my wife (I’m an ex-smoker and my wife has never smoked before). At one point, we went to bed and I discovered that there was already another Stacey there, apparently asleep. I realised I was dreaming and the Stacey who was awake pulled me into bed with her. This seemed to cause me to feel my sleeping body stencil and almost foul. I resisted the pulling force and separated. It was dark and I palpated my dream body in order to deepen the phase state. I could see my toes clearly and could also see that I wore strange pyjamas. Tactility was still superior to vision and I went downstairs in the semi-darkness. Christmas decorations were up like in the real world. The lucid dream began to evanesce and I excited the sense of touch by groping dream objects, lingering on a tiny gold-framed portrait of a strange face on a living-room wall. The environment became ultra-vivid nearby but somewhat darker outside a perimeter of a few feet away from me. I rushed back upstairs, stomping the floor, and demanding clarity as I had my plan to communicate with the subconscious firmly in mind. The bedroom was murky so I pressed the light switch but it didn’t work. I rubbed my hands together and demanded pellucidity. Subsequently, the dream world became bright and clear.

There was a massive red telephone (nonexistent in the real world) on my wife’s bedside cabinet. I picked it up and started pacing up and down with it in order to preserve the lucid dream. A few feet away from me, a dream character resembling Stacey milled about. (Later, in the waking state, I wondered if this character was indicative of another step in my plan of action which had also been on my mind: the deck of cards experiment which involves my wife’s assistance.) With a strong expectation to converse with my subconscious, I began to speak firmly with the red mouthpiece near my lips. The following dialogue took place between me and a telephonic voice which was eerily similar to my father’s and lent the impression of my future, older self:

Me: “I’d like to speak to my subconscious.”
Telephonic voice: “Subconscious?”
Me: “Yes please.”
Telephonic voice: “Okay.”
Me: “Can you tell me something important?”
Telephonic voice: [Mumbles incoherently and almost inaudibly]
Me: “Can you say it louder? Louder please! Tell me something important.”
Telephonic voice: “Your mother is the best mother in the world.”
Me: “Okay.” [Expecting more]
Telephonic voice: “And tell your wife to relax and not worry so much.”
Me: “Okay.”
Telephonic voice: “She’s doing a great job. Tell her to relax or she will destroy herself.”
Me: “Okay. Thank you.”

I fouled and woke up. It was 8.10am. I jotted the experience down in my journal and began to ponder about the dialogue between me and what I took to be my subconscious. Recalling the part where the voice mumbled, I began to wonder if my mind was taking its time assessing its content in terms of importance. But why not have an answer pronto? (After all, the subconscious has had plenty of time to be ready since the act of asking the question of importance was previously planned, in the waking state, prior to the lucid dream.) Unless it answers to such specific requests only when the lucid dreamer stimulates a response with a question or demand. This implies a chain reaction within the mind and seems to go against the notion that there is an autonomous subconscious entity, an inner self so to speak, within all of us.

The voice’s remark about my mother is probably a lovely and convenient hyperbole that I would like to remind myself of every once in a while. My mother is getting older and will soon become a shadow of her former self, so I think it is important that I remember her when she was at her finest. The advice about my wife is more or less what I tell her every now and then, especially when she stresses about things. The part where she could destroy herself is a little dramatic and not something that I would blurt out (at least consciously by the looks of it). Overall, it seems to me that, on this particular occasion, my subconscious didn’t have anything new to express. At least not new to me. Perhaps I already know what is important to me in my life.

[Summerlander]

Date: 09/12/2020
Method of entry: conscious dreaming
Bedtime: 8pm
Awakening: 5.30am
Return to bed: 6am
Attempt: successful
Phase state experience: Mike, the despondent aide

I cannot recall how lucidity was gained but I do recall feeling lost while I was dreaming, and if it wasn't some oddity that was spotted, unable to find my way home has been listed as a cue for lucidity.

I deepen the dream environment by heightening the senses and notice there are a lot of dream characters around me. As in a previous lucid dream, I have fun fighting with some of them and give myself a sense of having great power over other people. I can fly, climb and leap through the air like a superhero. I remember Stephen LaBerge encouraging to face fears in the form of nightmares or frightening dream characters. I see an aggressive, physically imposing man victimising other people in my lucid dream. I feel apprehensive as I glide towards this angry hulk and there is a strong instinct to be on guard---my senses paradoxically urge caution even though I know I am dreaming. (Awareness of gamma phase state on the verge of collapse if I entertain the notion that I could be in danger somehow.)

I remember that the goal here, ultimately, isn't to physically overpower the imposing dream aggressor with my godly superpowers. I am lucid enough to have great recall and LaBerge's lessons from EXPLORING THE WORLD OF LUCID DREAMING resonate in my head. I approach the hulk aware that he is me---it is all me! Virtually, he is a realistic figment of my imagination in 3D; and perhaps representing much more, something deeper from my unconscious mind. I am willing to befriend him, understand him and, as I approach, he gets smaller and less threatening.

He begins to resemble a meek psychotherapist Gabor Maté, albeit looking very depressed and hopeless. This depressed character seems to be aware of every potential problem in my life, as though we have a strong telepathic link. 'What's your name?' I ask, and he replies, 'Mike ...' followed by an exquisite surname that now escapes me. I quiz him on plans to circumvent potential waking life hardships, expecting some kind of epiphany or problem-solving revelation packed with emotional vigour as described by other lucid dreamers who have attempted this, but on this occasion I receive a hopeless vibe. I begin to feel like the head of a psychic government, where Mike is one of my aides telling me no preliminary solutions have been produced. This makes me feel like I have to be the strong one and get my house in order, so to speak.

I study Mike carefully as his despondent, frail and gormless form leans against a granite pillar next to a house that seems to be part of a gloomy, urban nightscape. I feel sorry for Mike so I embrace him, assuring him there will be a plan soon. I feel like a father reassuring a child even though there seems to be a lot of uncertainty. I take off towards a starless sky, wishing to carry out one of the steps of a plan of action I formulated before bedtime---I know it has something to do with space at this point.

I pause in the sky, aware that hesitation is a risky deal in lucid dreams, hovering above ill-lit rooftops as I try to recall my extraterrestrial destination and phase state agenda in detail. I remember wishing to visit Saturn's moon, Titan, but the realistic sense of space, as I hover above the dark town, makes me think the Saturnian moon is out of reach by millions of miles. I tell myself space is an illusion and begin to spin like a dervish with my eyes closed in order to subsequently find myself standing on Titanian soil, but an ounce of self-doubt in spatial darkness causes me to abandon the idea of teleportation.

Instead, I dart towards the black void's horizon at tremendous speed hoping to spot a luminous speck indicative of my desired destination. Unfortunately, I wake up. The day hasn't fully dawned and I realise I have a busy day ahead.

[Summerlander]

Date: 10/12/2020
Method of entry: deferred direct method
Bedtime: 8pm
Awakening: 12.05am
Return to bed: 12.15am
Awakening: 5.05am
Attempt: successful
Phase state experience: clapping echo

Between around 12.15am and 12.30am, I attempt a deferred direct method of entering the phase, having failed at an attempt around 8pm, prior to sleep, by completely falling asleep. The period between eight until midnight is characterised by some dreaming involving family members and acquaintances I no longer see in waking life. REM sleep kicks in, some vividness, and a particular dream involves a banquet full of delicious food. My palate is particularly sharp. Despite the obvious signs, dream consciousness does not ensue.

After midnight, having used the loo and checking my Phaser app to remind myself of the essence of the deferred direct method, I make another attempt at phase entrance. I start by relaxing on my back and peering into the void behind my eyelids. It doesn't take long before I see imagery, dreamlets that come and go as I lightly dip into sleep. After a shallow free-floating state of mind period that couldn't have lasted more than a couple of minutes, I become strongly aware of lying in bed in a state of sleep paralysis, my body temperature having apparently dropped as though I am in a mild state of sedation. My left hand rests on the bed and I feel my index finger twitch. I start to wiggle it and eventually raise both phantom arms, which feel unusually light. I am sure I am in the phase state, so I gently sit up and propel myself forwards and float out of the sleeping body.

The environment is a replica of the bedroom displaying an anomalous structure. Next to my sleeping form is my wife, sitting up in bed and examining the luminous screen of her smartphone, apparently oblivious to my floating self. Like a ghost, I pass through a wall and experience some friction. I feel that this pressure or resistance inside the brick wall could increase and I could get stuck. My legs, at this point, are still inside the bedroom, but my head, arms and torso stick out on the other side---which reveals a dark alley that does not exist in the real world. It looks wet, dirty, and feels cold and unappealing, so I do a 'U' turn in order to explore my home interior. This time my bedroom is not there and I walk through an unusually long hallway before reaching the living room. Christmas lights adorn its interior as in reality, but my colourful surroundings are fading. I stomp on the floor as I continue to move forwards, towards where the bedroom should be, hearing thudding accordingly. I rub my hands and start clapping, which sounds muffled at first, so I clap vigorously to amplify the sound whilst also using my will to dial up a notch. It's a clapping sound that would make sense if not for the strange echo that follows it almost immediately.

I reach the bedroom and my wife is still there, checking her smartphone. Suddenly, I am back in my sleeping body. I sit up and ask my wife, who is still checking her mobile phone, if she noticed anything unusual in the air---entertaining the possibility of a real out-of-body experience having occurred, where my consciousness, against scientific reasoning, exited my physical body. She looks up and tells me she didn't notice anything unusual while I was asleep. Subsequently, I wake up for real, realising I had just experienced a false awakening. The room in darker in reality and my wife happens to be asleep. I fall back to sleep and dream about my old house in Portugal which included people from England. It doesn't seem to last long and I get up just after 5am to make some notes about the experience.

[Summerlander]

Date: 17/12/2020
Method of entry: dream consciousness
Bedtime: 1am
Awakening: 6.45am
Return to bed: 7am
Awakening: 8.25am
Attempt: successful
Phase experience: Libby and Beano

REM sleep having returned to bed around at 7am is characterised by vivid dreaming displaying cues about the illusory nature of my experience: moving house during a pandemic (never); smoking (I quit months ago); being excited about finding a couple of bags of cannabis on the floor (I'm done with its recreational use); organising a housewarming (out of my mind in a silly dream state).

I go to bed (mattress on the floor) with my wife in this strange new house. I hear footsteps and my youngest son opens the bedroom door to say he's not feeling well and needs a day off school. 'What's the matter?' I say while I get up to examine him. 'My back hurts', he replies. His back reveals a strange bruise and I send him back to bed. Beyond the room, I see my eldest son go to the kitchen to make himself breakfast. At the end of the hallway (abode now resembling the one in waking life), Kayci, his girlfriend, has the front door open and she's having a cigarette. I walk towards the entrance to look at the morning view outside, expecting to see the spacious, public lawn which is shared by many neighbours but typically deserted at dawn, only to discover my false awakening situation.

I'm shocked to find a vast park replete with people noisily congregating, and the colossal industrial buildings in the background clearly defying the logic of being remote from commercial areas and living by a river in waking life. 'Is this a lucid dream?' I ask Kayci. 'Yes.'

I push my right hand through the door jamb and watch my limb being engulfed up to my elbow by the wood with barely any resistance. I notice my former neighbour Libby in the bustling park, beckoning to me in her typically risqué manner whenever she had a reefer to share. As her mischievously grinning form wiggles her long index fingernail, I realise the risk of being lured into an ordinary dream state.

I run through the crowd in the opposite direction to beckoning Libby, desperately trying to remember the plan of action I had only just written down prior to bedtime. I frantically run and leap, annoyed that I can't remember one single step of the plan, and partially disturbed at the prospect of a premature collapse of the phase state. I could ask Libby for mnemonic clues, but she vanished, and a demented life-size Beano-like character is chasing me around this crazy playground. I find him very distracting and I feel like it would be impossible to reason with him.

I wake up, content and slightly annoyed, with white noise petering out in my head. I make notes to remind myself to rehearse the plan of action in imagination prior to the next attempt and that in the phase total control is attainable. The Libby and Beano simulations would have bent to my will.

[Summerlander]

Date: 15/12/2020
Method of entry: deferred direct
Bedtime: 4am
Awakening: 8am
Return to bed: 8.10am
Awakening: 10am
Attempt: unsuccessful

• Tips that could help with both direct and indirect methods: upon awakening, without movement, gently focus on the middle of the forehead, centre point, without straining.

• Body position: imagine being the opposite position of the one you are physically in upon every awakening without movement, e.g., if on your back, imagine being on your belly; if on your left, imagine right and vice versa.

• Tips for the dream consciousness method: focus on dream signs: in REM sleep, celebrities like Seth Rogan having gay sex whilst driving; people engaging in martial arts everywhere on the streets; smoking; a seminar where I am trying to teach people how to enter the phase; racing through forests like Takeshi's Castle; seeing old acquaintances. Perform reality checks.

[Summerlander]

Date: 15/12/2020
Method of entry: dream consciousness
Bedtime: 4am
Awakening: 8am
Return to bed: 8.10am
Attempt: successful
Phase experience: swimming-pool world

Dream state ab initio: I am looking for a young man who had agreed to partner up with me in teaching people to enter the phase as a business. I am in a building which happens to contain a Sainsbury's supermarket, on an upper floor, waiting for the lad who is nowhere to be seen. While I wait, someone tells me to go for a swim in their indoor pool, to my surprise. I enter a massive hall containing the swimming pool and become consciously aware of dreaming.

Consequent phase state: I have to contain my excitement in this lucid dream, when I realise the swimming pool suddenly has no margins---it has turned into a playfully turbulent sea and I take advantage of it by frolicking over and under the wavy surface of the water. Above the sea, there is no longer an indoor ceiling. It is a pale, foggy sky with flashes of lightning. Beautiful but slightly frightening. I decide to conquer this mild fear by plunging into the pale, menacing sky. I hear water splashing everywhere and the sound of strong winds is quite prominent, but I do not feel cold or wet---instead, I am mildly excited about my surroundings. Vestibular sensations here seem to maintain the phase state.

I keep flying upwards, wanting to reach a level above the overcasting foggy atmosphere to see the greater beyond, until, to my surprise, I come into contact with netting fabric. The whole sky seems to be made of a vast, flowing white sheet of this pale fabric, and there is no horizon in sight. I wrestle with this soft net which, for a second, insists on enveloping my head.

To be continued ...

[Summerlander]

Date: 22/12/2020
Method of entry: dream consciousness
Bedtime: 2am
Awakening: 8.30am
Return to bed: 8.40am
Attempt: successful
Phase experience: parallel reality school


I have never met another version of myself in a parallel universe, but I have had a fight with a malicious 'alter ego' that emerged from the shadows of a dark bedroom replica after rolling out of my perceived sleeping body.

Other than that, I remember an old experience where I deliberately created a wormhole and went through it to find a futuristic metropolis populated by cyborgs that drove flying vehicles like The Jetsons . I have also deliberately inhabited the bodies of other characters in the phase space.

I also entered the phase this morning which turned weird and culminated in an erotic fantasy.

Dream state:

I'm a primary school pupil and I am sat in a little rickshaw with a boy I took to be my best friend. He is trying to help me wheel this thing through the school's corridors and classrooms, but I want him to sit back and enjoy the ride while I make the effort.

The ride now has enough impetus to roll by itself while me and my little friend sit back and relax. We are laughing because we're evading the school's authorities and, simultaneously, I get the impression that we were supposed to be attending a class. The scholastic adults nab us and we are marched into the headteacher's spacious office.

The man in charge is a tall, middle-aged man donning circular specs and a thick, grey moustache. Despite staring at me with a condescending air or superiority, I start coming to my senses; I'm an adult, I don't go to school, and as lucidity increases with memories of real life, I even glance at my child-friend with a smirk as if to let him know that everything is under control

Phase state:

'I wish to see Christopher Hitchens!' I demand from the headteacher. 'I want a lesson from Mr. Hitchens---not you!' By now, other characters seem to have joined us. A couple of men wearing lab coats stand on either side of the towering headteacher, who leers at me and finally scoffs: 'What do you think this is?'

Slightly taken aback by his response, but remaining defiant in my newfound lucidity, I riposte, 'This is a dream! I'm dreaming all of this and I demand to see Mr. Hitchens!'

The headteacher sneers as he cocks his grey head to the side. 'He thinks this is a dream ...'

Laughter resounds in the office. 'What?!' I exclaim as two middle-aged women wearing tunics grip my arms. I notice a couple of figures marching a little boy out of the room. I think of recalling the plan of action for lucid dreaming but the women are rubbing my chest and begin to lift me off the floor. Other urges begin to emerge and I inexorably abandon even the idea of summoning Christopher Hitchens.

warning: sexually explicit (I feel like I should alert members in some are too young or are sensitive to this content for some other reason)

It feels so real and I'm getting aroused. The woman holding me to my right unzips my trousers and exposes my penis, which looks small and is completely enveloped by her hand. She masturbates me frantically. It doesn't take me long to climax and semen is ejected everywhere. I see people sitting on the floor, watching as they get sprayed by my protracted ejaculation.

'I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!'

Disgust and embarrassment almost kill my sexual excitement but the women who stimulate my child-like body reassure me with words like, 'Don't worry, dear!' and the other chuckles before stating that 'they don't mind'. They put me down and I notice another tunic-wearing woman smiling seductively at me as she stands by the door through which they had taken my friend. I am covering my mouth with my hands in disbelief before I wake up.

Waking state:

I check my underwear and there is no evidence of having ejaculated in real life. But there is an erection. I am still aroused and my wife wakes up. Luckily for me, she is also horny and we make love.

As you can see, this experience did not go as planned and was quite unexpected. We appear bound to call something like this a 'lucid dream' and indeed, with a little determination, we can exert some control. Most of the time, even when we get the expected, the desired manifestation isn't exactly what was initially envisioned.

But this particular experience had a character of defiance expressed by figures with ostensible sentience. Perhaps my childlike defiance by truanting in my ab initio, mindless dream state was reflected back to me when I finally gained waking consciousness in the dream.

Was I really lucid in a dream or lucid somewhere else just as real as this reality? Can we really afford to say we can know with certainty that an experience is a dream by spotting impossible distortions, when in waking life our perception of the 'real' world can be equally distorted with powerful psychedelics or waking hallucinations caused by schizoid conditions?

Could such distortions be mere 'side-effects' of a phenomenal consciousness that can flit between parallel realities and even adopt the memories of parallel-world inhabitants? Perhaps a boy in a parallel universe suffered a schizoid episode and momentarily declared, like a stubborn solipsist, that everything around him was a creation of his own mind, and would-be responsible adults raped him before having him committed.

I sincerely hope that the lucid dream theory applies in this case as I would not wish a terrible fate upon even a hypothetical being living in another world.

[Summerlander]

Date: 24/12/2020
Method of entry: deferred direct
Bedtime: 2am
Awakening: 5.15am
Return to bed: 5.45am
Awakening before returning to sleep: 6.45am
Final awakening: 10.40am
Attempt: semi-successful
Phase experience: false awakening uncovering my wife

Dream state:

I go to bed around 2am and set Lucid Dreamer app's delay time for a sleep cue at 180 minutes.

A horrible quasimodo arrives at a party and starts murdering everyone. I notice a girl is scared and hide with her in a bathroom.

For a moment, I think a dangerous triceratops is coming and an image of one flashes in my head. I peek outside, it looks like an aquarium, there is music redolent of a Jurassic Park show, and the murderer is coming. Now we hide in a basement (no longer a bathroom).

The quasimodo has a flat, deformed head, as though missing part of his brain, but he is a large human with an indifferent facial expression. He enters the basement and I jump on his broad back to stab his deformed head with a sharp object.

I wake up with Lucid Dreamer app's auditory cue which surprisingly sounds exactly like the Jurassic Park tune from my dream. Now I know what it sounds like! The app's visual cue is flashing and lights up the room. It's 5.15am. I record the dream and use the loo before returning to bed at 5.45am.

Lucid Dreamer app's cue set to go off in 60 minutes and sound is lowered.

Waking state:

I return to bed just before 6am, having recorded a dream and used the loo. Lucid Dreamer app's cue set to go off in an hour. I lie down on my back and relax. Soon, dream impressions manifest but don't last. I cycle through brief visual and auditory hallucinations, a process that my wife interrupts as she tosses and turns in her sleep.

I lose consciousness and come to just before 7am with the app's auditory cue going off. I hear white noise in my head. I turn off the sound cue and adopt a sideways position. A pulsatile hiss emerges in my head and seems to get faster and louder.

Phase state:

I aggressively roll out of bed and stand, pulling the cover with me and disturbing my wife. The room is dark and I apologise to my wife who chuckles and tells me she gathered that I was trying to have an out-of-body experience. Suddenly, I'm back in bed realising I had actually achieved a false awakening. I fall asleep.

Dream state:

I'm in a car with a man that resembles Raj, a former local butcher. He is driving me around town and comes close to having a few accidents but the car transmutes regularly. Even though such shapeshifting is impossible in real life, I merely find it interesting and remark to the driver that it's quite 'cool'.

We finally crash into another vehicle and a family becomes argumentative. A teenage girl starts quizzing us about the car and road manoueuvres that led to the accident. I feel like she's trying to embarrass us, as I struggle to address her questions. I don't want to be here.

I'm sitting in a bed with two strangers resembling Iggy Pop and Glen Benton from death metal band Deicide. I am holding my smartphone and listening death metal music. All three of us enjoy the fast drumbeats, menacing guitar riffs and guttural vocals until 'Glen' leaves the room. There is a third party in the room, sitting with me and 'Iggy'.

This druggie-like character is in his underwear and appears to have a semi-erection. 'Are you gay?' Iggy asks. 'No. Honestly,' I hear the reply, 'It's going down.' He covers his crotch and presses down on his bulge. Me and Iggy stand up and stare at him. I wake up around 10.40am.

These dreams were recorded using the Lucid Dreamer app for the first time. The 'phase state' simply means the hybrid brain state that combines wakefulness and dreaming at gamma frequencies---where, besides lucid dreams, false awakenings manifest. The phase state can be mistaken for the waking state until the person becomes lucid, i.e., recognises it isn't real.

[Summerlander]

Date: 05/01/2021
Method of entry: dream consciousness
Bedtime: 3.30am
Awakening: 8.30am
Return to bed: 8.35am
Awakening: 1.30pm
Attempt: briefly successful
Phase experience: Waterspout/false awakening
App: Phaser

Waking State

I drink a bottle of Bailey's and devour a few episodes of The Undoing series. It is well past midnight. Just before bedtime, I drink cloves tea and fall asleep to a video about lucid dreaming on my Phaser app. Upon my first awakening from deep sleep, I make sure my son is up for his remote lessons and return to bed after using the loo.

Dream State

Dream recall is vague but the setting is a beach house that I take to be mine despite the contradiction with waking life. I open the front door to admire the beach under an unusually colourful night sky. There are no stars. The sky is characterised by vivid multicoloured patches, like Monet brush strokes resembling chromatic cloud wisps against a deep ultramarine, celestial canvas. The dark sea appears to be receding, as though a tsunami is brewing near the horizon, where the vista is a lot darker and turbulent; a massive waterspout tornado is forming before my eyes, and my alarming urge to call my wife inside the house is quickly overturned by the realisation that I'm dreaming.

Phase State

The colossal waterspout dominating the sea doesn't take long to disintegrate. I allow myself to get too excited and vision starts fading. I run inside the house to touch as many objects as possible, feeling like I'm moving through an unstable corridor with furniture units along the way. Panicking that the lucid dream might collapse, I spin for a couple of seconds and then deliberately fall backwards. I perceive my body lying in bed but immediately bounce back up no matter the outcome. I'm walking around in my bedroom and perambulate into the living room. The environment is dark but feels absolutely real—as opposed to dreamlike—but I still entertain the possibility that it is hallucinatory in nature; I rub my hands and the room brightens gradually. Subsequently, I find myself lying in bed for real as my wife jolts me in her sleep. I review my experience in order to refine my practice in future attempts.